We all know that walking is good for us. In an article entitled "The benefits of walking and how to get the most out of it" by RJ Skinner and featured on CBC Life , Skinner includes some interesting facts about what is considered our most natural form of exercise: "Regular walking has been shown to fight genetic weight gain, curb cravings, ease joint pain and strengthen your immunity." I especially liked hearing that "walking can help tame your sweet tooth; even a 15 minut

When we are watching the final scenes of a movie, or reading the final pages of a novel, we look to have things wrapped up. Although I suppose we are ultimately looking for that happy ending, we are also aware that sometimes that is not entirely possible; at the very least, we wish to be satisfied that "things worked out in the end." It is very similar in our own stories. People often come to therapy because of an event that has happened to them; perhaps they are wrestling w

I love this quote by Victoria Erickson: "When you reach your edge, soften. Soften until you slip through the constraints and can create a new rhythm, a new route, a new release. Water is soft yet powerful. Reach your edge, and soften. - Victoria Erickson Our rigidity and inflexibility have the ability to hold us back. We can experience this type of unyielding thinking at work, in our relationships, in our expectations of ourselves and others. I especially appreciate Erickson'

I recently read a meme that made me laugh: The book we really needed was "What to Expect 17 Years After Expecting." The teenage years can be some of our most challenging as parents, but also some of our most rewarding. In an article entitled "The teenage brain: Seven things parents should know about adolescent behaviour" featured on Women's Hour, BBC Radio , we can read about some of the characteristics that affect our teenagers. A few that I appreciated: "The teenage brain

There are days when we feel overwhelmed. Maybe we have a lot on our plate that day and between our work or home obligations, our to-do list is full. When this is a 'sometime' occurrence, our adrenalin and cortisol kicks in to give us that extra energy boost and we land into bed at the end of the day feeling tired but accomplished. When this is an everyday occurrence however, we are setting ourselves up for chronic stress and eventual burn-out. It is true that our circumstanc

Perfectionism, like any quality, can be found on a continuum. Some folks may find themselves with perfectionist tendencies, forever pressuring themselves to achieve flawlessness - in their work, state of their home, creative endeavours. Other people may not be drawn to extreme perfection, but aim for excellence or impeccability in their achievements. Sometimes, a lack of understanding of something philosophical or existential in nature, can prompt us to getting it right - an

I often caution clients as to the language they choose to use when describing their experiences. "I am crushed." "I am devastated." "I will never come back from this." The language that we use plays a direct effect on the choices we make in our response to our challenges and difficulties. And yet, it is also important to be able to describe and identify with the feelings we are having during those experiences. Joel Olsteen has this to say about using the phrase " I am ":

I especially love this passage by Mother Teresa: "Do not think that love, in order to be genuine, has to be extraordinary. What we need is to love without getting tired. How does a lamp burn? Through the continuous input of small drops of oil. What are these drops of oils in our lamps? They are the small things of daily life: faithfulness, small words of kindness, a thought for others, our way of being silent, of looking, of speaking, of acting." - Mother Teresa, No Greater L

Sometimes we get really stuck in something we wish would change. When we are also challenged by a situation that is unjust, our tenaciousness in trying to avoid reality becomes even stronger. We remain in an unhealthy relationship, on the potential of change. We suffer through a toxic work environment because "it shouldn't be this way." We avoid facing the truths that are painful by stuffing them down. We get wrapped up in the drama around us as a way to evade examining our o

Our survival brain is constructed to be alert and ready at any sign of danger. It is the part of the brain that will create a fight, flight or freeze response when our system becomes alarmed. In short, it creates a cone of attention - essentially, we become super focused to the alarm in our system and our energies are directed towards getting out of the danger zone. Thank goodness we have this cone of attention! Imagine encountering a bear without it - or not reacting quick

I recently saw a meme by Scott D. Clary that said: "True productivity isn't about doing more. It's about doing less, but with more impact. Your goal isn't to fill your day, but to empty it of the unnecessary." This reminds me of what I often tell clients about building time. When our day sits before us and we feel overwhelmed by all the tasks in front of us, or we feel underwhelmed with nothing planned, we are in a position of filling time. For the overwhelmed, the pace is on

We often label emotions as either good or bad. We have certain emotions that we welcome such as joy, happiness, contentedness, peace - and those that we consider to be unwelcomed such as sadness, rejection, guilt, anger and so forth. Our attitude towards emotions are influenced by society, culture, our own experiences, and what we were taught about them growing up. Emotions; however, are neither good nor bad. They just are. When we feel sad about something, we are meant to

In an article entitled "Author Kelly Corrigan reveals the hardest thing she says to her kids" by Allison Slater Tate and featured on Today.com , Tate writes about four phrases that we need to get comfortable saying to our children. Based on Corrigan's book, "Tell Me More," I especially resonated with the first one featured in the article: "I don't know." Tate writes: "In our effort to soothe our kids with an immediate answer — often delivered with high conviction — we are pe

I often speak about the importance of making self-care a part of our daily routine; to have non-negotiables that align with a centered place in ourselves so as to face the challenges of the day. Perhaps one way to look at it is to have a 3 goal day; to be able to choose something that works for you in one of these three categories: An activitiy that lines up with our emotional health: reading, listening to a podcast, writing in a gratitude journal, doing a puzzle, being creat

When my youngest daughter was about fourteen, we started our own little book club. We chose the Harry Potter series by J.K. Rowling; she would read a book, I would follow, and then we would watch the movie together. In 2016, we took a family trip to Florida and part of our holiday was spent at Universal visiting the Harry Potter park - it was quite neat to experience the books come to life. Here are three of my favourite quotes from the Harry Potter series: "It is our choices

Seeing someone cry has the ability to make our own eyes well up with tears. When someone starts to get cross with us, we feel our own anger begin to rise within ourselves. When some is especially wound up in our presense, we can begin to feel the flutter of anxiety in our chest. This process is known as emotion contagion and it comes to us because of mirror neurons in our brain. Our ability to read another's emotional state is an important way for us to improve our communica

When we think about the amount of thinking that we do in a day, the amount is quite staggering. If we overthink and ruminate, we exponentially increase our thought process, circling and circling but coming up with no definitive result. Our decisions remain unmade, our anxiety has increased, and we are more likely to choose avoidance rather than solution - only for our overthinking brain to resume its cycle at some point. The first thing we can consider is "Does it have to be

Relationship issues are often at the forefront in individual therapy. It can be a current issue that is affecting a relationship or it can be an issue that is historical and has always existed - a parent's continued expectations or lack of acceptance, a sibling who is jealous and drama driven, a partner who is unmotivated. Whatever the issue is, it remains something difficult to conquer, a continued disappointment; it has become unmanageable or heavy. When it comes to relat

I have come to appreciate this quote by Kahlil Gibran: “Some of you say, “Joy is greater than sorrow,” and others say, “Nay, sorrow is the greater.” But I say unto you, they are inseparable. Together they come, and when one sits alone with you at your board, remember that the other is asleep upon your bed.” ― Kahlil Gibran We spend a lot of time focusing on happiness. Granted, 40% of our contentedness comes from the activities we choose, and therefore becomes an important p

Grief tends to revisit us. At the later stages of grief, there is a feeling of integration of our loss; we are able to recognize that the bereavement we have endured also sits alongside the love we felt and the strength we have gathered through the process. We can be moving right along, joyfully integrated, when a trigger upsets the apple cart. Sometimes it comes in the form of a dream, other times in circumstantial events that are happening in our lives, sometimes it comes